Sunday, November 30, 2008

life sucks

quite simply that.  i feel completely inadequate. i'm irresponsible. i never get anything done when i'm supposed to. i procrastinate like no other. my ex-BEST friends and i don't exactlly "hang out" anymore. i'm so confused about how i WANT to feel, and how God wants me to feel. [ you wouldn't understand]. i'm sick of being mocked. i'm even more sick of people mocking God. you selfish, arrogant, clueless people; how can you NOT see how much God has given you? and for what? your LOVE. your stinkin LOVE is all he wants in return for all the pleasures, and riches and luxuries of this world. He's given them to us, yes, but he wants you to see that these earthly materials are not what life is all about. we're spoiled ROTTEN. even if you say you're "poor" you have no idea. if you have clothes to wear (even if it's the same sweatshirt everyday) you've got half the world beat. if you have food at least once a day_whew boyy, you're rich. 

i don't know what to make of my friends.
i don't know what to make of my family.
i don't know what to make of myself.
What do i make of my relationship with Christ? [i need help♥]

SPEAK LORD, I want TO LISTEN. _but am i listening?

2 comments:

Chris Bearer? said...

Molly, quit being so hard on yourself.

you're a truely amazing person.

like, when you came over with Caleb, and the time before that. It was tooo much fun.

and I don't know if you'll agree. but you want to feel the way God wants you to feel. well if your one of his Children. Don't you think he wants you to feel loved?

and just my thought. I know you want God to steer you in the right direction. but don't you think that sometimes God wants you to help yourself?

Just, I hope you feel better about your self.

-Chris.

Evan Eisel said...

i agree with chris/melissa. you are veryyyy amazing. don't feel like you have to satisfy everyone. breathe.